| Freedom of, uh, Speech? |
[Oct. 3rd, 2006|01:28 am] |
I freely admit I got this from ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) jwz, who is in my friends list
My favorite news story of the year.
I seriously teared up from this one. I nearly swallowed my tongue. I could have DIED!
You have GOT to love any news story with the sentence "When told to show
more respect for the country's rulers, he farted loudly and was promptly
arrested."
I could write titles and clever tags for this all day.
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, and flatus the sincerest
form of enmity.
Don't swallow your words, as they might come out wrong.
His true feelings spoke behind his back.
I wouldn't want THAT used against me in a court of law.
Not surprisingly, none of his friends have stood beside him since the
incident.
I've got a MILLION of them!
Try the veal, and don't forget to tip your server! |
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| If I Was King of the World |
[Oct. 3rd, 2006|08:53 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | all about me | ] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Omaha | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | SLAMmin' | ] |
| [ | listening to |
| | King for a Day | ] |
1) Couples in matching track suits would be outlawed
2) Track suits would be outlawed (except on track)
3) Everything must have a "return to zero" button on it, 16 levels of undo, and must whistle to let you know where it is when you lose it.
3) No cell coverage in theaters and auditoriums, but actual cell coverage where it is advertised to exist
5) Meatnecks get the boot put in
6) You can have a car alarm if you want, but if it EVER goes off--EVEN WHILE YOUR CAR IS BEING STOLEN--you get slapped around.
7) "Smoking" laws replaced with air quality requirements
8) "I'm sorry, that's our policy" synonymous with "We are about to have every single one of our policies and its results audited, and I'm about to get a physical from a doctor with freakishly large knuckles"
9) No killing off superheroes and then bringing them back.
10) Four strips of bacon, on everything, for everyone, if they want it. You may substitute for steak fries or onion rings. |
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